Frustration. I guess it was inevitable that I'd start to make a real effort and that I'd get my ass handed to me. I knew enough to know I didnt know shit, but I didnt know just how little I really knew until I decided to really try...and I discovered that I know less than shit.
Been a while since I felt this helpless. "Why do I suck so much at this?!" "oh yeah, you dumb fuck..you just started painting last week". At least, I try to remind myself of that. I'm SUPPOSE to suck, but you try convincing my slow brain of that. Things were alot easier, when I wasnt doing anything but pushing paint around, but I knew that could last.
So yeah, I wanted to do a cool piece, but its just beyond me at this stage. Still have no idea what I'm doing with color, I can't blend for the love of fuck and just all around suck-assed-ness. I'll do my best to take it on the chin and learn from the many, many, many....MANY screw ups, foul ups and fails I committed on this one. You screw up enough and youre bound to learn something, right?
A few first times on this one. First time on something other than canvas. This is on smooth illustration board. Still not sure how I feel about that part. I like being able to work in greater detail (for all the good it did me) but I kinda missed the texture from the canvas. First time using more than two brushes. First time I really put some time in to a piece...
The scan is really screwy too. Not helping. I still havent figured out how to scan these things. It picks up the textures nicely, but everything else is way out of wack. Not a PS guy, so I cant just fix it digitally either. Anyway, it actually does look alot better in person. I'll at least say that about it. I love Hellboy and I hate seeming him like this. He deserves better.
Painting #4 was a rough one. Need to go lick my wounds.
I think you're a bit too rough on yourself, Mister Stevens. Looks to me like you captured the character quite nicely. I'm sure you did better than a lot of other folks could have. The space between the upper lip and the nose may be a bit large, but it's not a game breaker. I like the scratches and texturing on the stone hand. I especially like the background shadow . . . the reminder that Hellboy's demonic heritage constantly follows him, no matter how hard he tries to escape it.
Youre right. You should probably get this out of your house so it doesnt stink up the place. I think you still have my address. Ill be happy to throw myself on the grenade. Thats just the kind of friend I am.
I understand everything you wrote and I won't candy coat it with ahhh's and oooo's cus I love your drawings and other art, but it's a start and I definitely see the Frazette influence I wish you the best on your journeys and await the improvements. Be easy.
"I can't blend for the love of fuck and just all around suck-assed-ness"
In any case, it still looks good. Just keep practicing and you'll get better. You know the routine of course.